The_TXT_Dumpster- being-the-president - Being The President

author:Justin "RFS" Bardin

 

         While I was at school, my history teacher raised a good point about George W. Bush. Out of all U.S. Presidents, he has visited the most elementary schools. This should have been obvious since he has yet to pass the fourth grade; he visits the most elementary schools because he is still enrolled at one. So, how can a man that hasn't passed the fourth grade manage Presidency? It's not easy.

GW: "...and that wraps up the details of the USA. Now. Does anyone know what 2 times 3 is?"

Mexico Representative: "Seis."

GW: "No, no. I seis what is 2 times 3? I need it for my homework man."

Japan Representative: "6."

GW: "Yeah... wait how do you spell that?"

Ireland Representative: "I. A. M. A. F. U. C. K. I. N. G. I. D. I. O. T."

GW: "Alright, gotcha. Thanks. Agh, damn what is 7 times 6?"

Germany Representative: "Let's just get on with this meeting ok?"

GW: "Yeah." *tries writing "Multiplication is unconstitutional" but manages to simply writes "NUMBARS ARE NOT COOL"* *leans over to Tony Blair* "Hey, what's that thing I can do to a law when I don't like it?"

Tony Blair: "Veto."

GW: "No, a Tivo is what I record Power Rangers with. Damn, don't you Brits know anything?"

Tony Blair: "I guess not."

Meeting Leader: "Ok, well, our next meeting will be on October 17th. Bush, cover your ears I'm gonna say a bad word... ... ... ok the meeting is really on October 18th, so you all need to change your schedule and not tell Bush ok?"

GW: *looks over at Tony Blair's paper where it says October 18th Meeting* "Heh. Meetings on the 17th." *looks over at China sitting next to him* "Heh you too. I'm the only smart listener in here."

         Well, that was the end of that meeting. It must have been hard to get through it all. Bush goes home and then he decides to prank call some people to have fun...

GW: "Heh, is your fridge running?"

Man: "Yeah."

GW: "Oh... ok." *about to hang up* "Hey do you know what 7 times 3 is?"

Man: "You know what, is your refridgerator running?"

GW: "Yeah."

Man: "You had better go catch it."

GW: "Uh oh! Thanks!" *click*

         Bush shows up for the next meeting on the 17th, only to find there is no one there. He sits at the chair marked "USA" for 28 hours until the real meeting shows up. The head of the meeting walks in and sits down, then notices Bush sitting there.

Meeting Leader: "Bush.... what are you doing here?"

GW: "It's about time you guys started showing up. I got here a long time ago and waited for you all."

Meeting Leader: "Riiight..." *thinks "Next time make the fake meeting a day AHEAD..."*

         Soon the rest of the world leaders show up and the meeting starts.

Japan Representative: "...so the current standing of my country is great. Are there any questions?"

GW: "Yeah..." *holding his Gameboy* "...do you know how to get a Pikachu into a Raichu? I've been playing this Pokemon game for like 5 days and he hasn't evolved yet."

Japan Representative: "...What kind of a question is that???"

GW: "Well goddamn you people made this game didn't you? I've been waiting for this meeting so I can ask you."

Japan Representative: "I take offence to that."

GW: "L O L!"

Japan Representative: "What did you just say?"

GW: "Heh. Just a little sometihng I learned on the Internets."

Japan Representative: "Then you need to level up your Pikachu to Level 5000 for him to evolve and you win the whole game!"

GW: "Alright... ok you guys continue whatever it was you were talking about. I'm busy now."

         Being the President AND attending school must be hard to do. Big ups to Dubya for being able to maintain his job and trying to learn his multiplication tables at the same time.

- Justin "RFS" Bardin